Monday, December 15, 2014

When Everything Went Wrong

Oh, welcome brave new world! Where women think for themselves and children no longer are seen and not heard!

Baby boomers (along with previous generations) longingly reminisce the good old days where their "lessers" sat in mute silence and did what they were told without question. Those days are done. Gone. Dead! To wish otherwise is a death sentence to the uprising generation.

It was yesterday afternoon my family happily visited my in-laws. Don't touch! Don't fight. Talk in a low voice. Don't be obnoxious. Chase, chase, chase. Well, while visiting the grandparents is a nice once-in-a-while event for us, it can be stressful. Especially when you have kids like mine.

I am raising my kids to be thinkers. To fight for their beliefs. To be unafraid to speak their minds. To love and obey their Heavenly Father. To know and love delayed gratification. To succeed in life. To act honorably and honestly. Every one of them has a headstrong leader within wanting to shine! And this creates many a conflict in the Mueller household. While this happens, I teach them the importance of teamwork and charity.

So, back to the death sentence of the uprising generation. There's no doubt. Look around you. Things are fast paced. In every way. Sex. Communication. Drugs. Jobs. Home life. Everything. If we raised our kids to run and hide when company arrives, what kind of adults will they become?

Our nice evening led to an explosive argument between the generations at the grandparents. You see, we have a soon-to-be 2 year old active little boy, and I stress ACTIVE. Grandparents had a beautiful china Nativity Scene on a table in the middle of their living room. I had politely asked if we could please remove this set so that Babykins would not hurt it. Grandma hesitated. She consented. I felt her hesitance. Boy, did I. So, I hired myself some teenagers to help me take it to another room. Grandpa saw us and said in so many words, "What are you doing? No. You put it back and just teach your little boy to not touch."

Taken aback, I said to my kids as I grabbed up my portion for its return, "Okay, kids, you heard him, let's put it back because we're going to do our super best to keep Babykins to keep from touching it."

Grandma heard that. And that's when it all exploded. Grandpa says that in his days, children did NOT touch. They obeyed. He pointed fault in the way we're raising our children. Doesn't he know the pressures they're facing? I am not going to go down quietly into the night and let my kids flail and fail and sink and fall. They will know who they are. They will NOT sit to be looked at, to be shut away, to bow their heads and say meekly, "yes, sir" because those days of quiet subservience is over.

I remember as a child, being afraid of adults. It wasn't until high school that I realized that teachers were human. Silly as that sounds, it was true. My dad taught me through example to be scared of adults. To shut up when he entered. To hide when he was angry.

I've had to reinvent my parenting skills because the example I have is not a happy or good one. While I had a broken childhood, I do not raise my children lightly. I think about their emotional well-being, their happiness and comfort. Their self-confidence, their desires, their needs. Everything comes with a price and that is the honor system. To honor is to live wisely.They are the world to me. I love them and want to stay a part of their lives as they search out for their own for when the time comes. What parent wants their children to never come back? What parent wants to badger their children with tradition that hurt them as children themselves to begin with?

I call this the the Generational Miscommunication Gap Crisis.

There is a fine line to raising children and I can say with a clear conscious that I am not raising hoodlums.


Wednesday, December 3, 2014

When a Hiatus goes Wrong

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Just a little something to keep going if you ever find yourself stuck in any way. Yep, bouncing back from the netherworld is proving a big challenge. One day, I will reclaim my throne. Until then ...


Thursday, November 20, 2014

My Personal Internal Conflict

"Do you think your value to Him (Heavenly Father) changes based on how many followers you have on Instagram or Pinterest? Do you think He wants you to worry or get depressed if some un-friend or un-follow you on Facebook or Twitter?"

I loved President Uchtdorf's Conference address. As an author, I get caught up in appearances (as in showing up) and worry about numbers rising or dropping. I am so tired of that. It's the constant nagging of having to show presence so that my fans won't forget me.

My publisher had once said that I've already built my fanbase and the true ones will be there as time moves on. It's constant work on having to maintain as well as garner them--remember all successful relationships require nurturing. Human nature.

I have a lot of work ahead of me, but feeling pushed and pulled; plus, not having the means to back me up makes it even more frustrating and I almost feel at a loss. As of now, I feel it necessary to decide what is more important and go with that.

If keeping up doesn't feel like this, how do you manage to work in your favor without all the anxiety? Don't get me wrong, I enjoy networking, making friends and everything authorly, but it's been overwhelming lately. I'd love to hear your thoughts either way!

Monday, November 10, 2014

You Are Invited!

M.M. Roethig has invited me to be a part of a WoNdErFuL celebration of her book baby, Raine.

I will be hosting Monday, November 11th at 6:15-6:30. Join the fun for a chance to win cool stuff like Darkspell's ebook & to be turned into an Elemental (illustrations done by moi!)

See you there!

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

#NaNoWriMo Luck and Luvs!

What a wonderful way to share your support with fellow writers! Click on the badge above to START!

So it's that time of year when we gather around the fire in our cozy fuzzy warm socks staring listlessly into a pulsating screen. Does it mock the words that crowd our brains (or lack of) as we scramble to hit our 50k before our writing buddy does? Or maybe a past record?

Remember to take a well-deserved day off to refresh the voices in your head!

What is your NaNo project this year?